Letting Go of Control: The Hardest Thing I Didn’t Know I Needed

I used to think I was trusting God.

I prayed every day. I read my Bible. I believed He had a plan for my life.

But if I’m honest…

I also had a plan.

Actually, I had several.

I remember sitting at my kitchen table one evening with my planner open, sticky notes scattered everywhere, and a notebook filled with lists. I had written down three different ways to solve the same problem. I kept thinking, “If I can just figure this out, then I’ll finally be able to relax.”

But I never relaxed.

Every answer led to another question. Every plan made me think of another thing that could go wrong. I would finally crawl into bed at night, exhausted, and my mind would still be racing. I’d replay conversations that hadn’t even happened yet. I’d imagine every possible outcome. Then I’d wake up the next morning and do it all over again.

I wasn’t tired because I had too much to do.

I was tired because I was trying to carry things God never asked me to carry.

Looking back, I realized something that was hard to admit.

I wasn’t trying to control my life because I was strong.

I was trying to control it because I was scared.

Somewhere along the way, I convinced myself that if I could predict everything, prepare for everything, and plan for everything… maybe nothing could hurt me again.

Maybe you’ve felt that way too.

Maybe you’ve smiled through the meeting at work while your mind was somewhere else.

Maybe you’ve answered everyone’s phone calls, helped everyone solve their problems, and then sat quietly wondering why no one knew you were struggling.

Maybe you’ve prayed for peace but spent the rest of the day trying to force everything to work out the way you wanted.

I’ve been there.

The hardest part about surrender isn’t giving something to God.

The hardest part is leaving it with Him.

I wish I could tell you there was one prayer that changed everything.

There wasn’t.

I would pray in the morning and take my worries back before lunch. I’d tell God I trusted Him, and then I’d spend the rest of the day trying to fix the very thing I had just placed in His hands. I wasn’t lacking faith—I was learning what surrender actually looked like.

That’s why Proverbs 3:5–6 became so personal to me:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

Notice what God doesn’t say.

He doesn’t say, “Figure it out first.”

He doesn’t say, “Wait until you’re confident.”

He doesn’t say, “Come back when you have all the answers.”

He simply says… Trust Me.

That changed everything.

I realized surrender wasn’t one big moment.

It was hundreds of little moments.

It looked like choosing not to replay the same conversation for the tenth time.

It looked like praying instead of panicking.

It looked like admitting I didn’t know what was coming next—and believing God did.

Some days I did that well.

Some days I didn’t.

Because life is messy.

Faith can be messy.

Growth is definitely messy.

But here’s what I’ve learned: God has never asked us to come to Him with everything perfectly organized. He simply asks us to loosen our grip enough for Him to lead.

So today, don’t try to surrender your whole life.

Just surrender one thing.

One fear.

One relationship.

One decision.

One unanswered prayer.

Leave it with God today.

Then tomorrow…

Do it again.

That’s how trust grows.

That’s how peace begins.

And that’s how surrender slowly changes your life from the inside out.

Many people spend years looking for peace in busy schedules, expensive vacations, endless planning, or another distraction that promises a break from the pressure. Those things may help you escape for a little while, but they can’t renew the way you think or teach you how to trust God more deeply. Lasting peace begins with inner transformation.

That’s why I created the Confidence Mindset Program.

I help people feel sure of themselves and live on purpose by teaching them how to change the way they think and partner with God to build the life they truly want.

You don’t have to keep carrying the weight of trying to control everything on your own. You don’t have to keep living with a mind that never rests and a heart that never feels settled.

Schedule your consultation call today at lifeisbutajourney.com and join me inside the Confidence Mindset Program. Together, we’ll help you renew your mind, strengthen your faith, release what you were never meant to carry, and begin living with the confidence and peace that come from fully surrendering to God.

Until Next Time Remember to Live Confidently on Purpose…