Category: Uncomfortable

I Knew Who I Was Until My Life Changed

There are some changes you prepare for, and then there are changes that divide your life into before and after.

Losing my mom was one of those changes for me. When she died, I wasn’t only grieving the loss of my mother. Somewhere underneath the sadness was a question I didn’t know how to answer: Who am I going to be without my mom?

I had known myself as her daughter my entire life. She had been part of my understanding of family, strength, and even myself. Then suddenly, she wasn’t physically here anymore, and life expected me to keep going.

That’s one of the hardest things about loss and change. The world keeps moving even when something inside you has stopped.

I kept moving too.

Eventually, I graduated from chiropractic school with my Doctor of Chiropractic degree. That should have been one of the happiest and proudest moments of my life. I had worked hard for that degree. I had accomplished something significant. But my mom wasn’t there. I remember wishing I could see her sitting in the audience. More than anything, I wanted to hear her say, “I’m proud of you.”

And because she wasn’t there, part of that moment felt pointless.

That’s messy to admit because earning my doctorate wasn’t pointless. I know that. But grief doesn’t always care about what makes sense. Sometimes you can accomplish something you worked years to achieve and still feel the emptiness of the person who isn’t there to see it.

I think that’s something we misunderstand about uncertainty. We usually think uncertainty means not knowing what’s going to happen next. But sometimes uncertainty is much more personal.

Sometimes uncertainty sounds like: “I don’t know who I am anymore.”

Maybe the relationship ended. Maybe the career that once made you feel successful no longer fulfills you. Maybe your business is growing, but you’re exhausted from carrying it. Maybe you’ve accomplished what you thought would make you happy, yet success hasn’t given you the peace you expected.

Or maybe you’re the person everyone depends on—the provider, the leader, the responsible one—and privately you’re wondering who you are when you’re not taking care of everybody else.

Uncertainty has a way of exposing what we’ve been depending on for security, the roles we’ve confused with our identity, how much control we thought we had, and sometimes even what we really believe about God.

After my mom died, uncertainty exposed something in me.

I believed I had to step into her shoes.

I thought I had to take on the responsibilities she left behind. I believed I had to be strong because she had been strong.

But underneath all of that was something even deeper.

I thought I had to become her.

I was grieving who I lost while believing I had to become who I lost.

At the time, I thought I was doing what needed to be done. I thought being strong meant carrying the responsibility, keeping things moving, and becoming the person I believed everyone needed me to be.

Maybe you know something about that.

Sometimes life changes, and before we’ve even had time to process what happened, we’re already creating rules about who we have to become because of it.

I have to be strong.

I have to figure this out.

I can’t let everybody down.

I have to keep succeeding.

I should trust God more than this.

After a while, those thoughts don’t simply describe what we’re going through. They start shaping who we believe we have to be.

Then something changes, the familiar answers disappear, and we’re left asking:

“Who am I now?”

I wish I could tell you that I figured that out shortly after my mom died.

I didn’t.

It took years.

Years before I understood that honoring my mother didn’t require me to become my mother.

My mother helped me become who I am, but God never asked me to become her.

God used my mom to help get me here, but He still had a plan for me. My mother loved me, influenced me, and helped shape the woman I became.

But God created me to become Jeanine.

And when my mother died, God didn’t leave with her.

That realization didn’t erase my grief. It didn’t make me stop wishing she had been sitting in that audience when I received my degree. It didn’t suddenly answer every question I had.

But it began changing the way I understood uncertainty.

I started realizing that not knowing what comes next doesn’t mean God has left. Losing someone or something that helped define your life doesn’t mean you’ve lost who you are. And having your life change doesn’t mean God’s plan for you disappeared with the life you used to know.

Hebrews 13:5 reminds us, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

I’ve had to learn what those words mean outside of the comfortable seasons.

Sometimes God’s presence doesn’t mean He prevents the loss.

Sometimes it means you discover that He is still there after the loss.

That changed my faith and how I understand identity.

The people we love, our relationships, careers, businesses, responsibilities, and accomplishments matter. But none of those things were designed to carry the full weight of telling us who we are.

Because life changes.

And sometimes the life we were certain we would have becomes a life we have to grieve.

That’s when the deeper work begins.

Instead of only asking, “What’s going to happen next?” I’ve learned that sometimes we need to ask:

“Who am I believing I have to become because my life changed?”

Maybe you’ve decided you have to become harder because someone hurt you. Maybe you believe you have to do everything yourself because someone left. Maybe you can’t slow down because people depend on you. Maybe you’ve decided starting over means you failed.

Those beliefs can quietly follow us into the next chapter of our lives.

Then there’s another question:

“Who is God asking me to become now?”

Not who does everybody else need you to be. Not who were you before everything changed. Not who do you think you should be by now.

Who are you becoming?

I’m still learning the answer to that question.

There are still times when uncertainty makes me uncomfortable. There are still moments when I’d rather know exactly what God is doing than trust Him without an explanation.

And I still wish my mom had been sitting in that audience.

I wish I could have seen her face.

I wish I could have heard her say, “I’m proud of you.”

Becoming who God created me to be doesn’t require me to pretend I don’t still want those things. Growth hasn’t erased my grief. I don’t think it’s supposed to.

But grief no longer tells me I have to become my mother in order to carry forward what she gave me.

My mother helped me become who I am, but God never asked me to become her.

God used her to help get me here. And when her part of my journey ended in a way I never wanted it to, God didn’t stop writing mine.

He was still there.

And He was still helping me become Jeanine.

My Traveling Friend, maybe your uncertainty isn’t only about what’s going to happen next. Maybe underneath everything that’s changing is a quieter question:

“Who am I going to be now?”

You don’t have to rush to answer it.

Maybe this season is inviting you to become aware of what you’ve been believing about yourself, acknowledge what you’ve lost, process what the change has brought up, accept what you cannot change, and begin taking intentional action toward the person God created you to be.

That’s the kind of deeper work we do inside the Confidence Mindset Program. I help individuals feel sure of themselves and live on purpose by teaching them how to change the way they think and partner with God to create the life they truly desire.

If uncertainty has left you questioning who you are, where you’re going, or who you’re becoming, schedule a consultation call at www.lifeisbutajourney.com to learn more about the Confidence Mindset Program.

You may not know exactly who you’ll be on the other side of this season.

I didn’t either.

But I’ve learned that when life changes, God doesn’t stop being God, and you don’t have to become someone else to survive what changed.

Sometimes uncertainty is where the familiar answers disappear, and you begin discovering who you are underneath them.

And sometimes it’s where you realize God was never asking you to replace what you lost.

He was still calling you to become who He created you to be.

Until next time, remember to Live Confidently on Purpose.

When Life Changes and You Feel Lost: Finding Your Way Through a Season of Transition

There was a season in my life when everything felt like it was shifting all at once. What once felt familiar no longer felt right, and the path ahead seemed soooooo unclear. I remember sitting quietly one evening thinking, Why does this feel so uncomfortable? Why does it feel like I’m standing between who I used to be and who I’m supposed to become? That’s what transition often feels like. A transition season is when life begins to move you from one chapter to another. It may come through a career change, a relationship shift, a personal awakening, or simply the quiet realization that you can’t stay where you are. Transitions can feel confusing because the old season has ended, but the new one hasn’t fully begun yet.

Transition seasons usually show up when growth is happening. They often come when God is preparing you for something different or deeper. You may notice them when you start questioning things that once made sense or when your heart begins searching for more peace, clarity, and purpose. The truth is, transition doesn’t mean life is falling apart—it often means life is being rearranged. The Bible reminds us in Ecclesiastes 3:1, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” Every transition has a purpose, even when you can’t fully see it yet.

During a transition season, one of the most helpful steps you can take is to slow down and intentionally seek God before making your next move. When life feels uncertain, the natural reaction is to rush into decisions just to feel in control again. But slowing down allows you to listen, pray, reflect, and gain clarity. This step is based on the principle of trust…trusting that God will guide you step by step instead of expecting yourself to have every answer right away. This principle is rooted in Proverbs 3:5–6, which says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” When you slow down and trust God first, the next step becomes clearer.

Many people try to navigate transition by gathering more information, reading another book, attending another workshop, or having long conversations about what might be happening in their lives. These steps can bring awareness and understanding, and they can be helpful along the journey. But often what people are still searching for is something deeper—real change, internal peace, and the confidence to move forward with purpose.

That’s where working with me inside the Confidence Mindset Program becomes a powerful next step. I help people feel sure of themselves and live on purpose by teaching them how to change the way they think and partner with God to co-create the life they truly want. This program is designed to help you rebuild trust in yourself, move through life’s transitions with clarity, and step into the person God is calling you to become. Join the Confidence Mindset Program by scheduling your consultation call at lifeisbutajourney.com. This is your opportunity to receive the guidance, mindset transformation, and faith-based support that will help you move through transition with confidence and peace.

Until next time, remember to Live Confidently on Purpose…

Sacrifice: Why Letting Go Is Often the First Step to Becoming Who You’re Meant to Be

Sacrifice is not about losing something; it’s about making room for something better. To sacrifice means to give up what feels familiar, comfortable, or safe so you can grow into what God is calling you to become. Sometimes the sacrifice is a habit, a mindset, a relationship, or even an old version of yourself. God often asks for sacrifice when staying the same is no longer helping you move forward. Sacrifice is the bridge between where you are and where God wants to take you.

A sacrifice usually comes when life feels uncomfortable or confusing. You may feel stuck, restless, or unsure of who you really are. That’s often when God steps in and asks you to release something so He can do something new. One feeling many people experience when they are called to sacrifice is fear—fear of change, fear of the unknown, or fear of losing control. But fear doesn’t mean stop. It often means growth is close. God asks for sacrifice because He sees the full picture and knows what you need to let go of so you can thrive.

The Bible reminds us in Romans 12:1, “Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, this is your true and proper worship.” Sacrifice is an act of trust. It’s saying, “God, I believe Your plan is better than my comfort.” When you make the sacrifice God is asking you to make, clarity starts to replace confusion. Confidence begins to grow. You start to feel more connected to who you truly are and the life you’re meant to live.

Avoiding sacrifice often keeps people feeling lost, unsure, and disconnected from themselves. Life starts to feel like it’s just happening to them instead of being created with intention. But when sacrifice is embraced, transformation begins on the inside first. Your thinking changes. Your confidence grows. You stop reacting to life and start intentionally co-creating it with God. Sacrifice opens the door to real change because it requires both faith and action.

This is where working with me inside the Confidence Mindset Program becomes the next step forward. Many people spend more money on vacations, entertainment, shopping, or quick escapes that feel good for a moment but leave their lives unchanged. Real transformation doesn’t happen on the outside first; it starts within. Working with me gives you the support, structure, and guidance you need to move toward lasting change. I help people feel sure of themselves and live on purpose by teaching them how to change the way they think and partner with God to build the life they truly want. Schedule your consultation call today and take the step that leads to real growth, real confidence, and a life created on purpose.

Until Next Time Remember to Live Confidently on Purpose…

“Let Go of Familiar—Your Growth Begins Where Comfort Ends”

Nobody really likes feeling uncomfortable. It’s awkward, scary, and let’s be honest—downright annoying. But guess what? Growth doesn’t happen where it’s cozy. Getting uncomfortable to grow means stepping out of what’s familiar so you can step into who God created you to be. I remember a time in my life when I had to make a huge decision that didn’t make sense to the people around me. I left behind a situation that felt safe but was keeping me small. It was uncomfortable, even painful at times, but it was the very thing that pushed me closer to my purpose and brought out strength I didn’t even know I had. God doesn’t call us to comfort zones; He calls us to grow. In fact, James 1:2-4 reminds us, “Consider it pure joy… whenever you face trials… because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”

Still, most people stay stuck because of one sneaky thought: “What if I fail?” I’ve believed that lie before, too. It kept me in places that looked okay on the outside but were draining me on the inside. That kind of thinking holds you back from creating your life on purpose. You stop applying for new jobs. You avoid tough conversations. You keep hiding your dreams in the back of your mind. But avoiding discomfort means avoiding the growth that leads to peace, freedom, and real joy. You were made for more, not just for comfort.

Here’s one way you can start today: do one small thing that stretches you. Maybe that means saying “no” when you usually say “yes,” or trying something new that you’ve been scared to try. Write down what you feel, and ask God to show you what He’s growing in you through it. Getting uncomfortable to grow isn’t about doing big, wild things—it’s about showing up differently, one brave step at a time.

Getting uncomfortable is where your growth begins, and coaching helps you stay on that path when your mind wants to run back to what’s familiar. That’s exactly what the Confidence Mindset Program is here for—to walk with you as you push past fear, break through limiting beliefs, and start showing up as the person God created you to be. When you commit to this journey, you’re not just learning how to handle life—you’re learning how to thrive in it. Peace in every situation, confidence in every room, purpose in every step. Schedule your consultation call today and begin living the life you were made for—full of joy, clarity, and unstoppable confidence.